If i come over, it means nothing
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
This is the prime rib incident all over again
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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