You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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