The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize
