I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Randomize
