I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
