I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
My vagina just recognized that song.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
True college students do jello shots in the library
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
