Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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