Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
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