How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
Randomize
