Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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