yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
