I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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