The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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