how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
