Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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