I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
