His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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