if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Randomize
