We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Randomize
