Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Please don't give away my fajitas
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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