All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
