Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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