I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
I have demons in me.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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