wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize