i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
