Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Randomize
