who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
