Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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