I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
