I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
