He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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