Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
Randomize
