I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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