THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
