Is it normal to miss your booty call?
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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