i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
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