Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Someone signed my nipple.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
