Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
