Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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