escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Your penis caused this!
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
