I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
