I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
