he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
That's intense
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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