Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize