I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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