ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
