I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
