I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
