hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize