The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I am spending my child support on dildos
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
