TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
