Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize